Logo designed by Susan Newman

Our sister site, Greening Families, was 1 of 112 blogs that participated in the Green Books Campaign organized by Eco-Libris.

For this event, books printed in an eco-friendly manner were reviewed by bloggers around the world in an effort to encourage publishers, and consumers, to consider the publication process for books. The books ranged from children’s books to cookbooks to books on green living so there is sure to be something that interests you. The full list of books and participating blogs is available here.

If you love books as much as we do, we also encourage you to check out Eco-Libris. Their site allows people to balance out the trees used to make books with the planting of trees, kind of like carbon offsets for books. If you are a member of a book club, an author, or a publisher, they also have info for you.

You can read our review (and register for our very first giveaway!) at Greening Families’ Green Books Campaign review. We hope to see you there!

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

We both have several projects coming due so had mapped out our week on Sunday. As Rich headed to the school, we quickly recalibrated our day. Maddy is a voracious reader so she is currently a fairly easy kid to care for when she isn’t feeling well. Some of our projects could be completed while tending to her. Phew! We created a new plan, then Rich got the girls and I scrambled to adjust my arrangements for the next day.

On the way home, Keena fell asleep. Hard. She’s a light napper so this was very unlike her. You can see what is coming, right? By the time they got home, she was feverish as well. Even though it was the afternoon, we decided to let her sleep and she slept for more than three hours! Keena is younger so she hasn’t yet reached the easy-to-care-for-when-ill stage so we had to create a third plan for the day.

Was creating three separate plans for today a pain? Yes, I would have preferred to stick with the first plan. However, I’m so incredible grateful that we were able to be responsive to the girls’ needs. In conversations with other parents, I know how incredibly disruptive a child’s sick day can be. With no way to plan for them, very few child care options, and plenty of guilt, these days are one of the black holes of parenting. Developing multiple plans was a small price to pay for being able to treat the girls like the priority that they are for us.

Stay well!

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

I just came across a medical study that illustrates some of the less-discussed connections beautifully. Researchers at the University of Southern California discovered that children are significantly more likely to develop asthma if they are exposed to air pollution and their parents have high levels of stress. The addition of parental stress had a huge impact on the likelihood that a child would develop asthma. I don’t think anyone would be surprised to learn that exposure to air pollution can trigger breathing problems but many would be surprised to learn that stress felt by a parent could impact the health of their child. It certainly has me considering how important it is to actively manage my own stress levels in a different light.

If you are like me and want to see the study for yourself, an abstract of Parental stress increases the effect of traffic-related air pollution on childhood asthma incidence is available on the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences website. A link to the full text, which requires a subscription, is also available there.

Bringing it closer to home, my family has been reminded once again about the impact of these connections. Last week, while racing around trying to accomplish one last task before bedtime (exactly what I tell the girls not to do!), I caught a doorjam with my bare foot and broke a toe. School started last week so I had had BIG plans for September. Many of those had to be put on hold and Rich and I had to redo our schedules. Several of our household systems started sputtering once I was laid up. Rich has done a fabulous job (thanks again for everything, honey!) but with one of the two adults not at 100%, laundry and cleaning tasks began piling up quickly. Once I’m more mobile, we’ve got some digging out to do, which will take away time from other things. Next time I will listen more carefully to my own advice!

What connections do you see among family, finances, income, and sustainability? In what areas do you feel strong? Where would you like to make improvements?

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Hello and welcome!

We thought it would be helpful to you to provide a space where you can see the different approaches Rich and I take to parenting, work, and our lives. Our personalities, genders, and length of time being self-employed all vary, which gives us different perspectives.

This past week provided a great example of that. Our youngest daughter started at the “big girl” school. After we dropped her off, Rich broke into a huge grin while I broke into tears. I had warned him that I would cry but he was still a bit perplexed. I had to explain that, for me, the move from preschool was momentous. The baby/toddler phase of child rearing was now done. I’m so proud of Keena and so excited for her but she is officially not a baby or a toddler anymore. He was looking ahead while I was looking back, feeling the bittersweet nature of parenting.

(For those of you with small children, give them an extra hug and kiss today. I know it feels like it is going to last forever, and not always in a good way, when you are in that time but it doesn’t. Really!)

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

Building a business based upon your strengths is not only easier, it is smarter.  You will get more done in less time by constructing your business around your strongest skills and talents.

In the beginning, you may have to do everything yourself but go ahead and identify the tasks that someone else could take on more effectively.  That way when money becomes available or you meet someone with those skills, you will be prepared to pay or barter for them.  For more on playing to your strengths, listen to this Startup Nation podcast on “Business Planning Smarts: Identifying a ‘Screaming Need’, and Playing to Your Strengths”.

If you need help identifying your strengths, think about:

1. Tasks you enjoy
2. Tasks that make you happy
3. Tasks where time flies for you

Raising a child is also easier when your focus is on strengths.  Here you need to examine both your own strengths and the strengths of your child.  It is easy (I think especially for moms) to fall into the, “What would a ‘good’ parent do?” trap.  Instead keep the focus on what your particular strengths are and how you can use them to parent your child.

For example, Richard is fabulous at making tedious tasks fun.  Cleaning up toys is a ball for our girls when he leads the way.  From a race against the clock (complete with bone-us points for the winner – thanks Ruff Ruffman!) to a never-ending round of “the clean up song,” he has a knack for getting them into the swing of things.  Go Daddy!

Also look at the strengths of your children and give them opportunities to engage their strengths whenever possible.  As another example, our youngest loves to “help” us.  She helps Richard cook pancakes (she mixes the dry ingredients) and helps me water the plants.  She clearly wants to be in on the action.  So we let her whenever possible, even if it takes a little longer.  And we use this trait to our advantage.  If we frame a request in terms of asking for her help, she is excited about the chance to act like a “big girl.”

For more about fostering your child’s strengths, see Raising Resilient Children by Dr. Robert Brooks and Dr. Sam Goldstein.  This is a helpful book, complete with examples.

Have fun discovering and using your strengths in work and in parenting!

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

1. Murphy’s Law is alive and well. Both my husband and I have worked in consulting (we actually met at work) so we thought we had experienced Murphy’s Law at its harshest. The notion that “if things can go wrong, they will” shifted to an entirely different level when we became parents who owned a business. If I had a hard deadline to meet and limited hours to complete the work, everyone in our family would become violently ill with the flu. If I had an important meeting at a client’s office, our babysitter would cancel at the last minute. It was stunning to watch this law come into play again and again. Know that it will. Which brings me to my second point….
2. Flexibility is crucial. Murphy’s Law ran rampant when I limited my options. When I leveraged the flexibility I had instead, the impact of Murphy’s Law was limited. If my daughter took an extra long nap, I would use that time to catch up on paperwork. After rescheduling several meetings and taking my baby to others after sitters canceled, I changed my childcare strategy and split the week between two sitters. That way even if one sitter had an emergency, I would (most likely) still get a couple of days to work. I also built much more time into my internal estimates for projects. I was accustomed to working at a sprint so estimated my project timelines from that viewpoint. Now I build in time for my children to be feverish and for me then contract their illnesses once the kids are feeling better – real life estimates, in other words. By assuming things will go wrong, their impact is lessened if they do.
3. Boundaries aren’t just for kids. With my office now in my home, the separation between work life and home life was initially, and for several years, very blurred. If I couldn’t sleep, I would drift into my office to “finish up a few things” and end up staying awake for hours. If the phone rang during dinner, I would “take a quick call” and end up motioning for my family to go ahead without me while a client started point number five on her thirteen point agenda. It took me a while to realize I needed boundaries for myself, not just for my kids. Now I have a designated work space and set hours when clients can reach me. When I shut down my computer, work time is done and family time begins.
4. Flowing cash makes for happy families. The first time that paying bills was problematic because a client hadn’t paid me on time was an eye opener. Cash flow can make or break a business! I had read that many times but living it was something else. Don’t paint yourself into a corner – establish an emergency fund or structure your business so cash flow issues don’t clog your financial life.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

1. Our day-to-day stress level is much lower with an e-fund in place. I was shocked when I saw how having an emergency fund in place turned down the volume of my worries about money. The week before payday used to be a time to fret as I nervously watched the mail for checks from clients and calculated what we could and could not buy at the grocery store. Now these weeks are no more stressful than the others. This alone is an incredible benefit!
2. Many individual situations are no longer stressful as well. Before we had money set aside, a “rainy day” was triggered by only a few sprinkles. Now we have an umbrella to keep us dry longer. This means new tires for our car are just new tires, not the beginning of a financial flood.
3. Our emergency fund helps me be a better parent. I’m sure there are parents who can put financial worries aside and turn their full attention to their child; I also know that I am not one of them. When I was worrying about paying each bills, I worried around the clock. Even when playing with my children, my mind was often working to figure out a solution so I was not always fully present. Now when I am with my kids, finances are not fighting for my attention.
4. We enjoy time with our children more. We find it easier to enjoy snuggling up with our kids when that overwhelming feeling of, “What are we going to do?” is not pushing for a seat on the couch. See also points 1, 2, and 3.
5. Cash flow has some help remaining fluid. I’ve mentioned the importance of cash flow in other articles (Four Lessons from Self-Employment). The issue is repeated because it is SO IMPORTANT. Interruptions in cash flow can destroy a business, even one that is chugging along on every other front. An emergency fund can bridge the gaps that can (and do) occur. A client’s accountant can have a family emergency, checks can get lost in the mail, and sometimes clients are having their own cash flow issues so aren’t paying on time. Whatever the case, knowing that you can play the waiting game without experiencing serious financial repercussions is a huge relief.
6. Money in the bank provides confidence. One unexpected but enormous benefit of the emergency fund is that it gives us confidence. Richard knows he can advocate for the right thing in his job, rather than solely being concerned about keeping a paycheck. I know I can turn down work if it is not a good fit, rather than thinking only of the bottom line. Richard and I have compared this to dating – when desperate, you don’t attract the attention you want. Confidence is very powerful. You’ll also feel great when you read financial checklists and can check off, “Build an emergency fund.” Knowing you did what you should do is an enormous boost.
7. Building an emergency fund models great values for your children. Saving money is hard, especially at the beginning. Talk with your family about what you are doing and why. One analogy that may help young children is discussing a first aid kit. You have band aids ready in case of an accident; you also need to prepare for other unexpected situations. Since children pay more attention to what you do than what you say, let them see you make decisions to save money and you’ll make a big impact on their financial future.
8. An emergency fund creates momentum. Studies have shown that self discipline in one area can increase your control in other areas. Since self employment requires lots of self discipline, getting your emergency fund in place can serve as a launching pad to your new life in more ways than one.

* To see the full text of this and other wonderful poems by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, visit http://www.online-literature.com/elizabeth-browning/.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

After our eldest daughter’s birth, Richard and I joked a lot about our “strong willed woman.” Maddy knew what she liked and did not like and was not shy in expressing her opinions! After a couple of months of jokes only sleep-deprived parents would find funny, it hit me one day that she would, if tragedy did not strike, eventually be grown. And I fervently hoped that she will grow into a strong-willed woman.

I started thinking about what other qualities I hoped she would have and decided to make a list. Kind, resilient, curious, and possessing a love of reading were some of the characteristics that topped my wish list for her. There were things we were doing to help nurture those qualities but as I went through the items I realized there were places we could improve.

And then it hit me – this is what Stephen Covey talked about with his principle to begin with the end in mind. Granted, I had not slept the night through in months but it amazed me how much this principle, which I had thought of mainly as a management tool, applied to parenting. What a thought – parent your child to help them develop the characteristics you want them to have as an adult!

We made some changes at that point and continue to refine both our wish list and our actions. It has been remarkably clarifying when we are faced with choices that involve short-term pain for us or our children. For example, when we tell the girls, “If you behave while we are running errands, you can earn an ice cream cone,” and only one child behaves, we have a choice. We can either let both girls get an ice cream cone (which is easier in the short-term) and teach them that we don’t mean what we say and behavior does not have consequences. Or we can let only the child who followed directions get a cone while the other wails (which is harder in the short-term, not to mention embarrassing) but teach them both that there are consequences, good and bad, for actions and we really do mean what we say.

So, what kind of an adult do you want your child to be? What skills or qualities do you think are most helpful or beneficial?

Note: I went back to reread parts of Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People after writing the above and found this quote: “If you want to raise responsible, self-disciplined children, you have to keep that end clearly in mind as you interact with your children on a daily basis. You can’t behave towards them in ways that undermine their self-discipline or self-esteem.” This is one of those books that seems fresh every time I read it since my perspective changes over time. If you’ve never read it, I recommend it highly. If you already have, read it from the perspective of a parent and see how it helps you.

I also recently discovered Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Families, which walks through how to translate the principles in his earlier book to families. I highly recommend this book as well!

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

We struggled with caring for our children in the way we wanted while still having some time to spend with each other, on ourselves, and, we desperately hoped, getting some sleep. We wrestled with paying off our credit card debt at the same time we were paying for child care. And, like most new parents, we often did this feeling we were alone in dealing with these issues.

When Richard and I met, back in 1998, we were both deeply in debt. We had student loans for graduate school (both) and law school (me). We had credit card debt from living expenses while we had been in school. Each of us had worked through school but our costs far outpaced the amounts we earned. Our debt was so large that we did not total it until we had been paying it off for several years since we were simply too afraid of what the number might be.

When we finally pulled out a calculator, we had more than $80,000 in credit card debt and more than $100,000 in student loan debt. And that was after years of payments! Writing those figures still makes me nauseous.

We became very frugal by necessity. This made us reconsider much of what people around us were saying. It turned out that we didn’t NEED a new car or stainless steel appliances to be happy. In fact, the used car we bought for $1,000 got us to work and back just fine, without the pain of a car payment. We learned that we were much happier with money in the bank than fancy appliances in our kitchen. (And the milk was just as cold coming out of our bottom of the line frig from Sears.) And we were proud that our lifestyle was becoming more sustainable.

We also started thinking a lot about what we really wanted out of life. We had both pursued career paths that turned out to have many more downsides than were initially apparent. We were both working for nonprofit organizations, not the highest paying of sectors, but were doing work that felt meaningful to each of us. However, expectations for long work hours and heavy travel schedules don’t typically lead to strong relationships or families. We wanted to make a difference in the world but believed we had to get our own home in order first.

We realized that having clear priorities and then working to implement them made most life decisions easier. Since we met, now eleven years ago, we have made many changes to our life. We have paid off mountains of debt. All of our credit card debt is paid off, as is the vast majority of our student loan debt. We have money in the bank, in retirement funds, and in college funds for our girls. And all of this was possible without us ever earning enormous salaries – we just got smarter about managing our finances. We have also expanded our sources of income so neither of us has to rely on the decisions or goodwill of one employer to bring home income.

We have both moved to self-employment and now work at home. In addition to cutting our commute to 30 seconds, we have the freedom to plan our time according to what is best for our family. This has meant some late nights as each of us has pushed to meet client deadlines but it has also meant taking part in preschool Halloween parades and Valentine’s Day teas with our kids without the lingering feeling of dread that often accompanies leaving the office in the middle of the day.

These and other changes have allowed us to focus on creating the strong family that we wanted for our children and ourselves.

Along the way we have searched for tools to help us create the life we wanted. While we found many sources that were useful in addressing individual topics, we had a harder time finding resources that covered more than one issue. However, putting it all together was our biggest challenge. Once we started talking with other parents (and realized we weren’t the only ones struggling), we learned that families were also having a hard time fitting all the pieces together. This site is about making connections, between topics and between people.

It is clear that our age is increasingly one of specialization, with individuals occupying their clearly marked niches. Sometimes, however, a generalist is what is needed most. We are not the foremost expert on personal finance, parenting, or entrepreneurship but we know a lot about managing all these issues at the same time. In addition, we can point you to the most helpful experts we found so you can dig deeper if your situation calls for it.

We also explore the links between these topics. You may not think that your relationship with your partner can impact your career or that your financial health can influence your physical health but research has shown that these connections are real. We’ll help you see where your efforts can have the biggest impact across your whole life and allow you to learn from others who have made the changes you are targeting.

We want your family to profit, in every sense of the word, with more money, more freedom, and stronger families!

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.

The site covers a variety of issues, including parenting, budgeting and cost cutting, employment, entrepreneurial activities, and managing all these things while living a healthy and sustainable life. Our goal is to help you make more money, have more freedom, and build the stronger family you desire.

The site was created by the husband and wife team of Stephanie and Richard. Stephanie is a grant writer who founded a nonprofit consulting company that she has run out of their home since 1999. Richard has recently switched from traditional employment to self-employment and is actively engaged in multiple ventures (a direct result of his ADD).

The parents of two young children, Rich and Steph have been wrestling with how best to balance their family life and professional lives. We know others are as well because the topic keeps coming up – at children’s birthday parties, school open houses, doctors’ offices, and the like.

We’ve found helpful information in a variety of locations, including personal finance books, parenting listservs, and management resources, but nothing that put everything together. Since our biggest struggle has been putting all the pieces of our life together, we wanted to share what we have learned and, we hope, learn from you as well. We want to use Family Profits to host the community of like-minded people we wished for when our children were born.

Please join us in making your family profitable, in every sense of the word.

No related posts.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.